Off the Record Read online

  Linc squeezes my hand and then releases it. "Yeah. I know you do. Look...I'm going to try to get a few hours of sleep."

  "Sure. I'll wake you up when we're getting ready to land."

  He doesn't respond but just leans his head back into the seat. With his eyes closed, he looks so peaceful. But I know peace is not what he's feeling right now.

  I really didn't have any intention of sleeping on the plane, but I just didn't want to engage in any further conversation about the potential trade. So I played possum...closed my eyes, and pretended to sleep.

  Letting my mind run the gamut of possibilities, I realized that moving to Phoenix would be painful. My dad was getting on in years and I didn't want to be separated by almost an entire continent. I also didn't want to be separated from Nix. It had been brutal when he was in Afghanistan.

  And weirdly...I didn't like the thought of being away from Ever. I know I screwed up with her by voicing my feelings while we were dancing last night. But shit...she's consuming me and I can't help the way I feel. Apparently, I just need to be a little more circumspect about the situation. I backpedaled, and she accepted said backpedaling.

  Here's the thing...we could be perfect together. I know it. She just has to quit living in the past and stop making decisions based on her experiences. And I know that's easier said than done. The most I can do is continue to fuck her silly and show her that I'm a good guy. That I would not hurt her the way she has been hurt in the past.

  We've arrived at Ever's childhood home and it's straight out of Southern Living. I know this only because Emily has those magazines stacked all over Nix's house. And that's the only reason I know that...enough said!

  The house is a huge, two-story Victorian with white trim and a massive wrap-around porch. Even though it's almost 1:00am, the house is glowing with lights. I can feel the excitement radiating off of Ever as she leaps out of the car and runs up to the front door. It opens and I watch as a woman, who looks exactly like Ever, opens her arms. My chest aches and expands as I see Ever step into her mother's embrace.

  I walk up the porch steps and I can hear Ever's mom say, "There's my baby-girl." The hug seems to go on for an eternity but knowing the way Ever feels about her mom, it's probably not long enough for her.

  Finally, Ever steps back to introduce us. "Mom...this is Linc Caldwell. Linc...this is my mom, Samantha Montgomery."

  I stick my hand out in greeting but Samantha Montgomery reaches up and pulls me down into a hug. "It's so nice to meet you, Linc. And please...call me Sam."

  I grin over her shoulder at Ever, who is watching us with careful eyes. She returns my smile, but it's hesitant.

  "It's a pleasure meeting you, Sam," I tell her. "You and Ever could be twin sisters."

  Sam gives off a gracious laugh that is suffused with southern charm. "Oh, you flatterer. I'd be so lucky as to be as gorgeous as my Everette Mae."

  Sam turns to walk in the house and before we follow her, I mouth the words Everette Mae to Ever, my eyebrows raised in question.

  "Oh, shut up," she hisses. "And don't ever call me that if you know what's good for you."

  I chuckle but bend to sneak a quick kiss on Ever's lips before we walk into the house. She places her fingertips on her lips, as if savoring the feel of me there. I have no clue what Ever has told her mom about us, so it will be interesting to see how this plays out.

  We follow Sam into the kitchen and she immediately offers us food. I'm actually hungry so I accept. While she sets out a veritable feast of cold cuts, macaroni salad and brownies, she and Ever chat about everything and nothing.

  It's nice to sit back and watch Ever in her element. I've always thought of her as an easy-going kind of woman, but here...with her mother...she's like a different person yet. There is an absolute peace about her and if it's possible, she looks even more lovely.

  "So, Linc...have you forgiven my little minx for that article she wrote about you?"

  I about choke on my brownie over Sam's direct question. I wasn't even sure if Ever had told her about that. I glance at Ever and she's staring down at her hands. That's a sure sign to me that she is still humiliated over what she did, and I have this urgent need to make her feel better.

  "Sam...if Ever had not written that article about me, I would have never had this opportunity to get to know your daughter. I'd say that was the best thing that has happened to me in a long time."

  I can see from the corner of my eye that Ever's head snaps up and I can feel the bore of her gaze on me. But I maintain eye contact with Sam, whose face goes soft and liquid at the kind words I just paid about her daughter. And while my original need was to take some pressure off of Ever, I realize that my words are utterly true. I am insanely happy that I've come to know Ever the way I have.

  Eventually, I try to take my leave, citing the need to find a hotel, but Sam is having no part of it. She insists I stay in one of the guest rooms and I finally accept. It's only after all three of us give a coordinated yawn befitting the late hour that we all walk upstairs to get some sleep. I sneak a peek into Ever's childhood room, and it's surprisingly mature. Cream walls, elegant prints, and cherry furniture. Ever whispers a quick goodnight to me and Sam settles me into the guest room, which is right across the hall from Ever.

  I've become accustomed to sleeping next to Ever and this is so going to suck not having her near me tonight.

  I'm finally starting to doze off after trying to clear my head of the lewd thoughts I've been thinking about Ever when I hear the door to my room open. I glance over and the light from the hallway silhouettes a tiny body standing in my doorway. It's Ever. Or at least, I hope it is and not her mother.

  She walks in and closes the door, throwing the room back into darkness. I cannot see her, but my ears open up and my breath catches when I hear the sound of something soft landing on the floor.

  Her clothing.

  My body goes tense and of course, I get a raging hard-on. I feel the covers slide back and the bed dip. As my eyes grow accustomed to the dark, I can see the outline of Ever kneeling beside my body. She takes her hand and slowly runs it down my bare chest. Reaching the hem of my pajama bottoms, she pulls them down. I'm going commando so once she pulls them off my legs, I'm as naked as I believe her to be.

  Finally, she slips a leg over me and straddles my hips, placing both hands on my chest. Leaning forward, she touches her lips to mine.

  "What are you doing?" I ask her in the barest whisper I manage.

  I can feel her smile against my lips and then she whispers back, "I can't stand to be away from you." She rubs herself on my aching dick and my breath catches.

  "What if your mom hears us?" I feel I need to ask that, but in all honesty, I don't care. All I can think about is getting inside of Ever.

  "We'll just have to be really quiet then, won't we?"

  My hands come up and grab her hips, pushing her down. She feels hot and wet as she rests against me. I bring one hand to her core and test it out. Hell yeah...she's wet.

  Ever bats my hands away and I hold my tongue, not knowing what she is going to do but dying to find out. I can't see her clearly so it is better to just feel. And I feel it all the way up my spine when she wraps her tiny hand around me. I let out a groan and I hear her say, "Shhh."

  I have to bite my tongue when she lifts herself up and guides me into her. She slowly settles down over me, and a tiny moan comes out of her when she gets fully seated.

  "Shhh," I tell her and she lets out a tiny giggle.

  Ever rests her hands on my chest and uses that for leverage to move against me. She goes slowly, up and down. Each stroke causing a massive pressure build-up inside of me. We've gone slow before, but we always ended up hitting it hard toward the end. We've always had privacy, and could let loose with sounds and noises while we had sex. This time, we can't, and she keeps her pace measured and soft.

  I wish I could see her. I wish I could see her fuckingly fantastic body riding me slowly to nirvana.


  "I'm close, Linc," she whispers, and that's all it takes for my orgasm to start firing. I hope I don't leave her behind. I can't help myself but I grip her hips and pull her up and push her down hard a few times, wincing as the bed creaks loudly. But I'm beyond caring if we get caught. I relish the soft gasp that comes out of her mouth as she slams down onto me and I explode right at the same time she does.

  Ever lets out a soft, "Ooohhh" and my breath comes out in a massive hiss. It is the quietest we have ever come, and somehow, the fact that we had to be quiet makes it more intense.

  After the last spasms leave our bodies, Ever slumps forward onto my chest and I wrap my arms around her. I never knew slow and quiet could be so satisfying. The fact that Ever needed to be with me tonight causes hope to swell inside of me. I am sated and now, oh so, tired. I fall asleep with Ever laying on top of me, oblivious to all else.

  I had awoken at 6:00am and Ever was gone from my bed. I got up and decided to run. I finish the last of my five miles and quietly walk up the porch steps of Sam's house. It's still very early and I don't know if anyone is awake yet.

  As I quietly walk into the living room, I'm startled when Sam pops her head out of the kitchen.

  "Linc! You're up early."

  "Yes, ma'am. I wanted to get a run in before it got too hot."

  "Well, come get some coffee and breakfast."

  I head into the kitchen and Sam has an amazing coffee cake laid out. It's so not on my approved list of foods but what the hell. I'm technically still on vacation.

  After she pours me a cup of coffee, Sam jumps right into some deep conversation. "So, Linc...exactly what are your feelings toward my daughter?"

  I about choke on the piece of coffee cake I'm chewing on. What is it with this woman asking me such personal questions while I have food in my mouth? "Excuse me?"

  Sam just stares at me levelly. I'm so not prepared for this inquisition. "Your feelings. For my daughter?"

  "Uh...I like Ever."

  The stern look on Sam's face disappears and she starts laughing at me. "Oh, my dear boy, it goes a little deeper than that."

  Never in a million years would I have guessed I was a blusher, but the minute she says that, I can feel my face heat up. What is this...a mother's intuition?

  I take a sip of coffee and decide honesty will win every time. "I mean...I really like your daughter. A lot."

  "But..." she says to encourage me further.

  "But...Ever doesn't reciprocate those feelings."

  "Oh, bullshit," she says.

  Now I do choke. I can't believe this lovely, sweet, southern woman called "bullshit". After I finish hacking and take another sip of coffee, I have the nerve to say, "You think she does?"

  Sam reaches over and lays her hand on top of mine. "I saw the way you two looked at each other last night when you got here. We were just standing around...talking...but the two of you kept stealing glances at each other. There's definitely something there. You at least have the grace to admit it."

  Could Ever actually have feelings for me? I don't want to get my hopes up, but if anyone should know Ever's mind, it would be her mother.

  I am lost in my thoughts but Sam brings me back to the present. "A mother doesn't want to see her daughter get hurt. Ever has been hurt enough."

  Well...if I thought I had a champion in Sam Montgomery, that thought has been dispelled.

  "I understand," I tell her. "I'd be protective of my daughter, too."

  "Then you should understand that I want you to have the chance to hurt her."

  "What?" What kind of mother wants that?

  "Relax, Linc. While I like that protective instinct that just reared up, it's not needed. What I mean is...I would like Ever to take the risk of getting hurt. If she doesn't, she'll lose out on what could be a great opportunity for something real. Are you understanding me?"

  Oh, I was picking up what she was putting down. It's the advice I would give to Ever if I thought she'd listen to me. That she has to take a risk that maybe we could have a real relationship. That while it is not my intention to hurt her, she has to take the chance to see if I would.

  "Maybe you can impart that to Ever while we're here," I tell her. "I'm sure you have much more sway with her than I do."

  Sam chuckles. "Oh, don't you worry about that. I would never miss such an opportunity."

  I look in the full length mirror in my bedroom and assess my outfit. We are doing a low-key birthday celebration for my mom. I've cooked her favorite meal and made a birthday cake this afternoon.

  The sundress I'm wearing is fine, but it's the dark circles under my eyes that give me pause. I didn't get hardly any sleep last night. I could kick myself for the weakness I showed. The overwhelming urge to be with Linc last night got the better of me, and I stole into his room to practically molest him.

  And the funny thing is, I didn't really go in there for sex. I wanted to just crawl into bed and hold onto him. But when I opened the door, and saw him lying there...illuminated by the hallway light, I lost my nerve. I couldn't just crawl in bed and do something as sweet as lay in his arms. So instead, I turned it sexual because that is all I want this to be. Well, it's really all I can handle it being.

  Don't get me wrong. The sex, as always, was phenomenal. And Linc held me tightly as he drifted off to sleep. But then I let prudence and my cold heart guide my actions. I slipped away and went back to my own bed. Where I laid awake, thinking about Linc. I finally fell asleep close to dawn.

  Despite my lack of sleep, today has been wonderful. Linc went off to visit some buddies that play for the Carolina Hurricanes and mom and I went shopping together.

  She looks fantastic...my mother. She's feeling healthy and her recent checkup with her oncologist went perfectly. And even as great as all of that is, I still walk around dreading that any day, the cancer could come back.

  My mom at least had the fortitude to wait until lunch before she hit me up about Linc.

  "I really like Linc a lot, Ever. Such a nice man."

  "Mmmm. Hmmm," is all I said.

  "He really seems to have his act together. And he's such a gentleman."

  "Yup."

  "He's really gorgeous, don't you think?"

  Oh, God, mom...really? "Oh, I don't know. He's okay, I guess." Even though he's hotter than Adonis.

  "Ever Montgomery, quit playing coy with me. I heard you go into his room last night. I saw the way you two look at each other. Now fess up. What is going on?"

  My face turned as red as a beet. She knew I was in his room last night? Oh, the mortification. "I'm sorry, mom. We didn't mean to disrespect you or anything."

  "Oh, stop it, Ever. You're an adult. Linc's an adult. I'm wise enough to know my baby girl isn't a virgin. You did live with Marc for almost a year."

  I didn't even know what to say. The burn of embarrassment still flowed through my veins. But I did need my mother's advice, so I needed to push past that. She already knew we were sleeping together, so I might as well get some good mom thoughts on the issue.

  I sighed dramatically, because the whole situation just seemed so overwhelming. "Mom...it's just sex. That's all it is. I mean...that's all it is for me. It's a bit more for Linc."

  "I don't believe you, Ever. You have too much of a heart for it to just be sex."

  I look into my mother's eyes. They are round and blue, like mine. They are also wise and full of sage wisdom, unlike mine. "I can't, mom. I can't let myself be hurt again."

  "But what if you're hurting, Linc?"

  "Then we have to part ways. I don't want to hurt him."

  My mom smiles at me in a knowing way. She sees something but I'm not sure what. She decides to enlighten me. "There mere fact that you don't want to hurt Linc means you already care for him. You may say otherwise, but trust me, your heart is already involved."

  Oh, God. I was so afraid of that. I mean, really afraid.

  "I don't know if I can do this," I whispered.

  "Baby...you can do
anything you set your mind to. I think the chance that you may have something really great is worth it."

  And now, as I stand here looking at myself in the mirror, I have to make a decision. Do I continue down this path, and open up my heart to Linc? Maybe I can open it up just a bit, and see where it takes me. If I sense danger, I could always pull back, right?

  I wish the decision were easy, but I don't have a sure feeling one way or the other. I sigh, and decide to leave this thought for another day.

  Opening my bedroom door, I step out into the hallway at the same time Linc comes out of his room. He looks amazing. His hair is still wet from a shower. He's dressed up for my mom's birthday dinner, even though it will just be the three of us, and that action alone touches my heart. I can feel the ice starting to melt, dripping away.

  I take two steps toward him and wrap my arms around his neck. His arms come around my waist and I realize that it feels good. Damn good.

  "Hi," I say softly.

  "Hi, yourself."

  "You look great," I tell him.

  "You look even better."

  "How about a kiss to prove it," and I can't help the breathless tone to my voice.

  Linc runs his thumb over my bottom lip before he leans down and takes my mouth. It is sweet, devoid of passion, and I find myself melting into it.

  He pulls away and links his hand with mine. "Come on...let's go wish your mom a happy birthday."

  You know how sometimes, things can be going so well, and you may not think you deserve that little sliver of happiness, yet you decide to bask in it all the same. And then, the bottom drops out on you and you didn't see it coming because you were sidetracked by that stupid, little sliver of happiness?

  Well, that's happening to me right now.

  Our birthday celebration with my mom was spectacular. She raved over the Chicken Marsala I made, and she and Linc had two slices of the chocolate cake I slaved over. Linc, so kind and thoughtful, had bought my mom a silver charm bracelet, and filled it with Duke Blue Devil charms. The mere fact that he remembered my mom was a Duke alumni caused my heart to thaw a little more.

  We are all sitting around the dining room table, and Linc is holding my hand, and I am thinking that the moment is absolutely perfect, when I hear someone call from the front door. "Sammy...it's me...John."