Sugar on the Edge Read online

Page 11

  A tiny moan comes out of her mouth, and her eyes glitter back at me from the ambient light of the lamp reflecting in them. “You didn’t do that,” she says without any type of conviction at all… and is that a bit of longing I hear?

  I finger the edge of her shorts. “I’ve done all kinds of dark and dirty things that your limited imagination could never fully appreciate. It would have been nothing for me to do that to you. ”

  “Maybe so,” she breathes out in a rush, “but you wouldn’t have done that without my consent. ”

  “Hmmm,” I say thoughtfully, releasing the denim material and placing my fingers on her hot skin, feeling her muscles jump underneath my touch. “I’m wondering… would you give me your consent right now? Would you let me tunnel my fingers inside just a bit, let me see if your panties are damp because what I’m saying to you now is turning you on?”

  She doesn’t move a muscle… holds her breath and watches to see what I’ll do. But that doesn’t work for me, because she’s going to need to be a little more forceful if she wants what I’m offering. I can see what she wants in her eyes, but yes… I want more.

  “Tell me, Sweet,” I taunt her as my fingers stroke back and forth underneath the hem of her shorts, just a mere inch from the edge of her panties. “Do you have it in you to ask for my fingers, or would you rather leap off this couch and flee away?”

  Savannah inhales sharply, and I tense as I wait for her to choose the latter option. I’m so f**king turned on right now by trying to dare her into letting me seduce her, that I’d probably hold her down and not let her up. She pulls her lower lip in between her teeth and chews on it thoughtfully while she weighs her options.

  “Come on, Sweet,” I encourage her, my voice rough with need. “Show me what you got inside of you… deep down inside. Take a walk on the wild side… you know you want to. ”

  Fuck me standing. Savannah flexes her h*ps upward, a silent demand that I move my hand. It’s clear to me now that she wants it, but she’s still too afraid to demand it out loud.

  Moving my hand away from her leg, I shake my head and chastise her. “Not good enough, Sweet. You need to demand of it of me. ”

  Savannah gives a tiny cry of frustration, and I can see the warring within her eyes. I’ve taken her so far out of her comfort zone that her natural inclination is going to be withdrawal, but her body is reactive to me and it’s battling with her common sense.

  “I know what you want,” I tell her softly. “You know what you want. But prove to me you have it in you to demand it. ”

  Blowing out a breath, she says, “I want you to…”

  “Tell me,” I urge her on.

  “Touch me,” she says softly.

  “Where?”

  Her eyes squeeze close, her brow furrowing inward. When she opens them again, she gives another frustrated sigh. “Between my legs. ”

  “Uh-uh,” I chide her. “Dirtier. Make it dirty for me. ”

  Savannah opens her mouth… she’s on the verge of telling me what I want to hear, and my c**k swells in anticipation. She’s going to push past her barriers and restraints, show me her dark side, and then it will be okay if I f**k her.

  I can finally f**k her.

  “I can’t,” she exclaims and surges off the couch. I rear backward, surprised by her move as she tries to push past me.

  My arm snakes out and grabs her around the waist, pulling her back down onto my lap, right onto my aching erection.

  “No,” she cries out, struggling against me.

  “Shh,” I whisper against her ear, but I don’t tighten my hold on her. She’s upset, and I don’t want to frighten her. Fuck… I want to console her for some insane reason, which is not a part of my DNA.

  “Shh,” I whisper again as I gently rub her back in broad strokes to calm her down. “I’m sorry. ”

  “You’re an ass**le,” she practically whimpers with her face pressed into my shoulder.

  Sighing, I push her back from me so I can look her in the face. “Yes, I am. I shouldn’t have pushed that way. I thought you could take it. ”

  “I’m not some sort of sick game for you to play with,” she says, her voice sounding stronger.

  “I know,” I agree with her, because it was the sickest of games. But f**k… she wanted me. For a moment, she was all in, and had I just accepted it when she said she wanted me to touch her between her legs, my fingers would be buried deep within her right now. But I let my own darkness and need for control dictate to me the way it would be played out. So I could make the terms and force her to abide by them.

  Pushing Savannah off my lap, I wait until she’s standing steady and say, “You should go. ”

  She walks on shaky legs into the kitchen, and I stand from the couch to face her while she gathers her purse and keys. Dragging my fingers through my hair, I sigh in frustration.

  Sexual frustration, but also mental frustration. What the f**k was I just doing?

  When Savannah reaches the door, she hesitates and then says without turning to look back at me, “I don’t understand what just happened. ”

  “Fuck if I know,” I mutter.

  Savannah then turns to look at me, cocking her head to the side. “I’m curious, Gavin. Did you want me too, or was that just a way to try to break me out of the mold you wanted to put me in?”

  Her words floor me and shame me all at once. In five long strides, I’m standing before her, cupping her by the back of her head with my hand. Leaning down close, I tell her, “I f**king wanted you. Don’t doubt that. But you’re right… I wanted to break you first. ”

  “Why?” she whispers, her eyes cautious.

  “Because I’m dark that way. I’m way too bitter for your brand of sweet. ”

  “I find that to be sad,” she consoles me.

  “Very,” I agree with her as I release my hold and turn away from her. “I’ll see you next week. ”

  I hear Savannah open the door as I start to walk back into the kitchen.

  “Gavin?” she asks hesitantly.

  “What’s up?” I ask, struggling for seeming nonchalance as I turn to look at her.

  “Want to take a break from your writing? Do something to get you out of this house tomorrow? It might do you good. ”

  “Excuse me?” I’m bewildered by this absolute change of subject.

  “I um… well, I volunteer at this no-kill animal shelter called The Haven. Want to come help me?”

  I stare at her like she’s a phenom from another planet. Her face is earnest, her intentions pure. She’s saddened by my darkness and wants to pull me out of it.

  Oh, Sweet… not going to happen.

  “No, thanks,” I tell her. “Not my sort of thing. ”

  “Oh… okay. Well, if you change your mind, just call me. ”

  “I won’t,” I assure her. “But thanks for the offer. ”

  “Sure,” she says with a smile. “See you next week. ”

  10

  Oh my God! I think I may be absolutely and completely obsessed with Gavin Cooke. I hate myself for it¸ but it’s completely true. I feel like a completely different person when I’m around him.

  When he’s taunting me.

  Goading me.

  Seducing me.

  I’m so far out of my league that my natural inclination is to turn tail and run, but there is a dark part to me… way deep down, that wants to explore the feelings he’s conjuring up inside of me with his voodoo magic.

  Last night… oh God, last night!

  I have never… ever… been so turned on, so sexually aware, as I was when he was speaking dirty words to me with his fingers on my leg.

  He pushed and pushed at me, and I wanted to roll over and give in. I wanted to tell him the dirty word he was looking for so he could push those fingers into me. I wanted it so bad I could taste it, and yet I let my fear and common sense prevail.

  When h
e pulled me back down onto his lap, and I could feel that huge erection pushing into my leg, I wanted to rub up and down on it and beg him to do something to me. I want to change time right now, go back, and demand it of him, like he wanted and I refused.

  I obsessed about it for an hour after I got home, still exhausted, yet too wired to sleep. I even sent him a lame ass text, giving him the address of The Haven and telling him, Just in case you change your mind. I’ll be there all day.

  He never responded, but that wasn’t a surprise to me. Gavin is so closed off in his own world that I don’t think he bothers with societal conventions.

  Pushing the wheelbarrow back into the supply room of the main kennel, I check my watch and see it’s only nine AM. It’s taken me just a little over an hour to feed all the dogs and cats. I make my way back through the kennel, making note that most of the dogs have left their runs because it’s nice and cool out. It should warm up a bit, which will make it perfect for me to start bathing them outside.

  Heading over to the stable, I mentally go over the rest of the chores I need to do today. After I finish feeding the horses and clean out their stalls, I have to bathe the dogs, clean out the cats’ litter boxes, and re-stock the indoor supply room from the small shed that houses the bulk feed supply. Then Brody asked me to run a few errands, which should still give me plenty of time to get back for the evening feeding.

  It’s a tough day of work, and I only do a full Saturday once a month, but it’s my pleasure to do so to give Alyssa and Brody some time together away from The Haven. They devote their entire life to their work here, so their Saturday’s off are well deserved.

  Just as I finish cleaning out the stalls, I hear a vehicle pulling up behind the kennel. I decide to leave the horses out a bit to stretch their legs in the small paddock, and head out to see who it is.

  Possibly Gavin?

  As soon as I step outside of the stable, I see, with utter disappointment, that it’s Brody pulling up. Not that I’m not happy to see him, because, hello… it’s Brody, but because I had been hoping—in my heart of hearts—that Gavin would come and spend the day with me.

  I wanted to get to know him better, because his dark allure was pulling at me hard. He also has me fascinated by this concept of how he views me, and I feel the burning need to make him see that I’m so much more.

  Brody gets out of his car as I walk across the grass that is just starting to turn brown with the cooler weather. “What are you doing here?” I call out to him.

  “Alyssa’s getting girlie shit done to her nails with Gabby and Casey, so thought I’d come hang out here today,” he says with a smile.

  I follow him into the kennel and he heads for the office he and Alyssa share at the front of the building. “Come on, Brody. It’s your day off. You should be out having fun. ”

  “Yeah, like what?” he asks as he sits down at the desk and fires up the computer.

  “Oh, I don’t know… get your brother and go surfing. ”

  “Yeah… sorry, but when it gets chilly enough you have to wear a wetsuit, I don’t go in the water anymore. ”

  “Wuss,” I tease him.

  “Absolutely,” he affirms, clicking on the Outlook button to pull up his mail. “So what all still needs to be done today?”

  “Most everything. I just got the animals fed and the stalls cleaned. ”

  He browses the emails for a moment, and then turns to me with a serious look. “Go ahead and clean the litter boxes and then run those errands for me. I’ll handle washing the dogs. ”

  “No freakin’ way, dude,” I tell him with a stern look. “I’m volunteering my precious time here, and you are not taking away the one fun thing I look forward to all week. ”

  Brody gives a bark of a laugh and stands up from the desk. Chucking me under the chin with his knuckles, he says, “Fair enough. Didn’t think I’d be able to pull that one over on you. Let’s go split the work, and then I’ll take you out to lunch before we run our errands. ”